


Fated?

by Starstarc



Category: Cricket RPF
Genre: Angst, Cricket, Dicks for teammates, Didn't Know They Were Dating, M/M, Oblivious Joe, Somewhat oblivious Jos, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Unrequited Love, streaking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-09-21 05:48:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17037851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starstarc/pseuds/Starstarc
Summary: “Heavens forbid he see his boyfriend naked!” Their was a murmur from the other side of the room and he caught Curran red handed whispering to Hales, Joe sent a glare his way, “What do you mean ‘boyfriend’?”-Soulmate AU





	Fated?

**Author's Note:**

> Uhhhh so yes i am posting this at 1:30 in the morning, but I’ve been working on this since the middle of the year and I’m so happy to finish it i just couldn’t wait to post it. It took me so long through on and off writing and i didnt realise how much you actually have to research, seriously how do you all do so much of it? Anyway i really struggled trying to figure out what to do for the ending but I’m pretty happy with how i wrote feel free to tell me otherwise. I hope you enjoy it!

Soulmates were a peculiar thing, some had them others weren’t so lucky. The cute little doodles and drawings that adorned the bodies of the young and the old were a sacred thing. The controversial views made it impossible to do the right thing, leave your mark uncovered and suddenly you were challenging fate, keep it covered only for your soulmate to see and you were part of the old generation and didn’t want to find their soulmate. There was no proper way to go.

Joe was a bit on the fence, he wasn’t explicitly hiding it but he didn’t just put it out in the open for all to see. When he was born and his parents brought him into their arms they caught a flash of blue, the three distinct blue blobs that with time would grow and stretch to form three very recognisable lions. They rejoiced knowing that there son had someone out there made just for him, that would fit into his life and cradle him in their arms during times of need. 

He grew up knowing that the mark on his body would ensure that he would be involved in cricket. He used to imagine being in the squad and when he turned 7 and started playing at the local club, they saw he had talent. But as he reached his teens and the competition got harder, he realised maybe he wouldn’t be a player. He could be a physio or a coach, the mark upon his hip didn’t ensure him a place in the squad. For all he knew he could be a spectator or maybe his soulmate was the real cricketer. But when the phone call came inviting him to participate in the u19’s World Cup for England, he couldn’t help the surge of excitement that rose as the prospect of finally meeting his soulmate.

He knew that it would be a boy, he had felt that way for a while, so when he got on the plane surrounded by the fiery young men, all excited to be away from home and playing for their country. He couldn’t help but be hopeful that the love of his life would be only a few meters away from him. He scoured the boys for any ones that caught his attention, most didn’t. But one stood out. Ben Stokes. The harsh attitude and loyalty to rival a golden retriever. He was loud, brash and protective of his friends. He was similar to Joe in personality and attitude but still different. He of course saw the amazing talent in the allrounder. He knew that he would be one to play for England, and hopefully he could join him too.

As the first game drew near they grew nervous, the batsmen didn’t leave the nets and the bowlers were rarely seen without a ball in hand. For most of them it was their first time representing England and their whole cricketing careers could ride on it. As they headed out to field they were told to forget the pressure and the outcome, focus on the moment, the lions on their chest and for Joe the other set on his hip. They went out and gave it there all, the obvious skill coming out in Nathan and David, but when Ben went in to bowl he couldn’t keep his eyes off him. There was also James Vince the other senior England candidate. And of course when they went out to bat, he smashed his way to seventy with James by his side, they had beaten Hong Kong with twenty overs to spare. He celebrated the win with pride but they had an early night as they knew they were nowhere near done.

When training ended early the day after their match they were rewarded with free time. As there was nothing better to do they gathered in their captains room, of course Azeem didn’t mind he was all for team bonding. Soon the cards were out and a passionate game of spoons began, he was seated next to Ben and one of the other boys Jos, the elbows bumping and the heated arguments gave Joe a whole new feeling, he enjoyed seeing the sweat gleaming on Ben's brow and the competition in his crystal blue eyes. When the first round came to an end, he relaxed back against the foot of the bed. A shrill ringing sound echoed through the room till Ben finally fished the phone out of his pocket and excused himself from the room. They started a new game, but Joe didn’t enjoy it as much even though he had had an intense final round with the quieter kid Jos, he was kind and all but a tad shy so Joe wasn’t sure if he was going to get along with him, but he seemed nice enough. He had played u17, u18 and u19 so Joe wouldn’t be surprised if he saw him again in the England team. 

When Stokesy (As he had been affectionately nicknamed) finally entered again a few shouts went up, “Who was that? Called out Joe over the noise, finally the noise partially stopped, “Just my girlfriend back home.” He replied as he sat down in the previous seat he had vacated. Joe’s heart dropped, he quickly pulled on a fake smile that barely hid the hurt in his eyes. “Found your Soulmate then huh?” He was hoping for a no but from the lovesick look in Ben's eyes he could tell the answer was against him. “Yeah,” he pulled out his left leg and rolled down his sock to show his lower ankle, “Got the matching rugby ball and everything.” As the eyebrows rose at the sight of the blue and white rugby ball contrasting harshly to the pale skin Ben began to explain, “My Dad was the coach for Workington and while I was at one of the games I met Emily, she was one of the players younger sisters.” A couple of wolf whistles and slaps on the back later the game resumed. This time after a few rounds, Joe excused himself, claiming he needed a shower before dinner, even though he was more of a morning showerer. As soon as he let the door shut the facade fell. He had really though Ben could be the one. But that door had just slammed in his face. There was no way anyone else in the team could be his soulmate he would just have to wait till he made it to the real England Team, where he belonged, where he could find his real soulmate. 

The rest of the series passes by in a flash, they passed the group stage. But as soon as they entered knock outs they couldn’t keep their form, the wickets fell and the runs failed to come. The several losses that followed ensured an eighth place finish. The ride home was full of silence, heavy hearts and heavy minds didn’t allow for the usual banter. When Joe got off the plane and headed out the airport to meet his mum, he was just happy to forget the losses and get back to club cricket.

But he knew that if he wanted to continue playing cricket and succeed, if he was to go on to captain England then he was going to have to get familiar with that feeling.

When the fourth test rolled around in India, and he stood in the middle of that circle, when one of the men he had grown up idolising was then giving him his very own cap. He was the 655th person to represent England, that was his number and nobody could take that from him. The series hung in the balance, England lead 2-1 and it was down to them to secure the win in the final match. It was the most pressure Joe had felt in a long time, to win a series on Indian soil for the first time in almost 28 years. When it was declared a draw they were of course happy with the win, but still the underlying feeling that they could of done better remained, even as they celebrated long into the night. 

The few days of playing with the best of the best let him forget the heartache he felt when even as a player in the England team he still couldn’t find the right person to match his mark. As he was called back for a T20 and the ODI’s he realised that he still has his whole career ahead of him, he still would have the chance to meet them in the coming years. 

Apparently he had played well enough to impress the selectors because following the tests against India he was recalled to tour New Zealand 

Years passed without fail, runs were scored and wins were celebrated. But his summer flings and short relationships never satisfied him. 

Players came and went, with many more caps being handed out but no lions to be seen. He of course didn’t rule out the fact that he had barely seen any of there hips but he was pretty sure that he still hadn’t met them yet.

He was right about Ben, he had played many games alongside him as well as James and even the shy boy Jos, who had grown into a powerful hitter and a handsome lad. Almost all his ODI and T20 games were played alongside Jos and he couldn’t help but enjoy the time they spent together. He was everything he wanted in a boyfriend and friend regardless, but he had known him since they were only 18, he had seen him coming in and out of showers for years. He surely would of noticed the distinguished symbol. 

When he heard that Jos would be coming back to the squad as well as Ben, he couldn’t help but be happy. The interviews he faced about the surprise test recalls were interesting per say. He told them honestly what he thought, that Jos had had an amazing winter and he was excited to see what he will bring. The role of captain had put so much stress on him, he was without a doubt going to be a great addition to the team. When he thought back to the days he thought they wouldn’t get along he couldn’t help but laugh, he was now one of the most trusted members of the team and someone Joe could always count on.

The idea of putting Jos in the role of vice captain came to him later at night a week or two before the series against Pakistan started, they had had such great success in ODI’s during the summer and the form of the players was up to standard. They were trying to bring the same style into their test cricket, that’s the reason they brought Jos back in and why the idea of Adil coming back was on the table. 

He had mentioned the idea to Trevor who had supported the decision. There was nothing wrong with Jimmy, but he definitely wouldn’t be opposed to spending more time with Jos. It wasn’t a crush or anything Joe assured himself, he just thought that Jos had a nice smile, and beautiful eyes, with those cute as dimples, and god his sexy body don't get him started on those thighs. But he wouldn’t set himself up for that pain of liking a teammate who obviously didn’t return the feelings. Additionally years of awkwardness at a failed relationship was not something he was leaning towards.

He knew it wasn’t the smartest idea, putting himself around the man who now constantly featured in his dreams, leaving him feeling hot and flustered. Now he would have to endure the constant time they would spend together discussing tactics and players. Letting the whole world know he was putting his faith in someone who hadn’t played test cricket in 18 months, if Jos didn’t perform the way they had hoped then he would be sure to face criticism. But how else was he supposed to get this team to actually win they needed that boost of confidence that maybe, just maybe they could provide.

He of course let Jos know and then the team before he released the news to the press. He had invited Jos back to his room to talk about his re-debut and anything with the team he might need to know. Joe decided that there would be no better time to tell him.

“Hey Jos?” He pondered out loud, Jos raised his head and looked at Joe as he twiddled his thumbs, “Look I don’t want to sounds like a sap or anything,” he begun, “But I’m really happy you’re back in the team and I’m proud that you managed to make your way back to the test side.” Jos smiled that cute smile when he was being modest or being praised, “I’ve always thought that you could play any format you want, and I think, well know that everyone is debating over bringing you back in to the team. So I thought what better way to show our support would be to uhh promote you to my Vice-captain. Only if you wanna take it of course.” He added the last bit in a rushed tone. But he couldn’t help it he was nervous that he would be told no, he feared that the team would be disappointed in his choice, that they would think he was picking favourites, he didn’t want to seem like he was undermining Jimmy. 

But all those doubts disappeared when he felt a pair of firm arms pulling him into a warm hug. It was one of those hugs you just didn’t want to let go of, the perfect amount of pressure and Jos’ head tucked into his neck. When he inhaled, his mind was filled with that distinct smell of Jos, it wasn’t something you could name but the smell of wood and sweat from the hard training spent diving for catches, mixed with his deodorant and something that just smelled like nature. Joe was pretty sure he was just making things up when he thought about it, but still, he was intoxicated by it.

When Jos finally pulled back with the biggest smile on his face Joe couldn’t help but beam right back at him. “Are you kidding, of course I will be your Vice, it's not like the thing I’ve been dreaming of since I was 6.” Joe was caught up in the moment and he didn’t want to leave. “Well then Vice Captain why don't we start planning some real tactics then?” He was about to start talking about spin bowlers and who they should include in future tests. But before he could start he felt the familiar presence of a hand on his shoulder, Jos’ face had turned serious now, and maybe those doubts had started to reappear but he quickly pushed them to the back of his mind. He had already accepted it no need to worry right? 

“In all honesty Joe, it really means a lot to me that your willing to put your neck out for me, I’m so nervous about coming back in, like what if I don't do well, I’m only back in because of my T20 playing not my red ball cricket. I just,” he let out a breath as he tried to convey his emotions into words, “ I really appreciate what you’re doing for me.” Joe was star struck for a few moments before he realised that Jos was feeling the same feelings he felt on his debut but Jos had to go through it twice, “Hey, I’m sure you’ll do fine, I mean my vice captain is gonna have to play more games than just one, alright?” He nodded his head before they returned to their previous conversation, before he new it it was already eleven, so Jos excused himself in need of some sleep.

As they went through the match, as they got ready to move on to Australia’s new captain and team, Joe found his gaze lingering more and more on Jos. Every time he caught himself he quickly pulled his eyes away and scolded himself, he couldn’t be caught giving heart eyes to his vice captain. He knew that Jimmy thought something was up with him which meant Cooky probably knew, and if they knew then Stuart wouldn’t be to far behind and if Stuart knew then the whole team wasnt far behind.. He decided he was better off ignoring his feelings, however that wasn’t going to work, every time he watched Jos in the nets or out batting, every time they passed in the hallways or the hugs after a catch taken. He felt his heart do a flip, he didn’t want that feeling to stop but at the same time he new that he was better off without it. 

After coming off the loss against Scotland no one was in a good mood, the bus was filled with long faces and everyone had their headphones in trying to forget the historic match. The press conference wasn’t much better, reliving where they went wrong and why. Everyone wanted to forget the day especially Morgs.

As the ODI’s began he was finally able to relax, no longer having to captain a bunch of men, having all the decisions laid on him, always being scrutinised for whatever he chose, the batting order, whether to declare or not. He was happy to hand that over to Eoin. But of course that meant seeing Jos smash his ways to hundreds, powerful arms hitting sixes without a care in the world. He pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind and focused on his batting. 

The first ODI was eventful,, They were pulling runs anyway to try and top Aus. 218 wasn’t a huge number but it still put them through their paces. When Eoin got his half century, and the applause of the crowd shook the stands, he couldn’t help but smile at the beautiful ground they played on. Then only one run away from getting his own fifty and Morgan chipped one threw to Paine, he looked to the balcony and to the thunderous spectators urging them on as they played on the familiar ground of The Oval. He leant back and hit the ball sending it skyrocketing behind him to bring up his fifty. The crowd was happy and when he walked down the pitch to see Jos standing there with a big smile on his face, making his dimples even more prominent through the grill. They bumped fists and he faintly heard Jos whisper “Proud of you Rooty.” As they passed, he couldn’t help but smile.

They won the match by 3 wickets, and they kept on winning. They had never felt better, everyone was smiling and the nights spent in the rooms drinking cider and beer surrounded by the best cricketers in the world, was enough to lift everyone’s spirit.

The fifth and final ODI came about, everyone felt the pressure. To secure a whitewash over Australia would be monumental, they had already won the series but it was still important to win. At least to them it was.

They lost the toss for the fifth time in a row and were sent to field. Australia’s batting was tough, they pulled powerful shots out of nowhere and in only 34 overs they were on 205, but the bowlers kept up to pace and finished them off quick. He was pretty sure they couldn’t of finished them off without Jos’ wicket keeping skills. (He may be a bit biased)  
That one throw he did where he turned in mid air piffed the ball back to the stumps and ran out Paine. When he stumped Shaun Marsh, even his little shouts of joy from behind the stumps kept the team (*cough*Joe *cough cough*) happy.

As Jason and Jonny went out to bat and he began to pad up, he noticed that the Australians had changed their tactics. Putting Jason up against left arm spin, it worked as he went out for only 1. He watched him stalk back into the rooms, they knew to leave him be. Only Billing’s could deal with a moody Jason.

Then it was up to Hales and Jonny to keep them up, but that wouldn’t work when Bairstow dragged it on putting Joe now in the spotlight. He went out but only managed one run, before he nicked it and was then walking of in a similar fate to Jason.

Their bad luck continued as Morgs went out for a duck and Alex stuck on 11, now he watched Jos pick up his bat and stride out of the room, but before he could get out of the door he grabbed Jos’ elbow. He turned to face him and gave him one of those award winning smiles, “Yeah Joe?” His mind went blank for a moment before he remembered what he wanted to say, “Go well Jossy boy.” Jos pulled him into a one armed hug before he jogged down the stairs to make the trip down to the pitch. 

Now he was alone he went to the balcony to watch the game proceed. Jos was hitting fours and sixes left and right. Hales went, Ali went, Curran went, Plunkett went yet Jos remained. They were 114 for 8 and still needed 91. He got his fifty finally after 74 balls and gave them some hope. Him and Adil would need to play there best, with Rashid on 20 and Jos on 98 they only needed 11 from 26 they were sure to win. Then Adil sent the ball high, and as if it was in slow motion he watched it sail right into the awaiting fielders hands. 

Now it left Jake and Jos to win the game, Jos was on strike as Stoinis bowled in. The whole team was out on the balcony crossing fingers and anxiously watching. Then Jos sent the ball flying through the air and past the boundary. The crowd erupted with cheers, Jos pulled off his helmet and held his bat high with pride. But it wasn’t over they hadn’t won the game yet. He hit another two in quick succession before once again Stoinis bowled at him, Jos put all his power into sending the ball towards the boundary for four. Sealing the win and making the series one to remember. 5-0 win against Australia, there biggest rivals. 

They stood on the podium with their medals and the trophy, he stood next to the man of the match each grinning and holding a bottle of unopened champagne. They shook it before pouring the bubbly alcohol over the captain, before they turned on the man of the hour and soaked him from head to toe and since Joe was next to him he got the splash back. 

They exited the pitch and headed back to the familiar rooms, more beer and champagne came out. The festivities continued as the highlights played on loop on the tv above them. As the time approached nine o’clock and the room began to quieten as the players began breaking up into smaller groups, Joe who was still covered in champagne slowly made his way to the mess that represented his locker. 

He scrambled around before finally finding what he wanted, he passed the other boys, towel and spare clothes in hand and made the short walk to the showers. These showers thank god were actual stalls unlike the ones at Yorkshire which was basically a massive room with eight or so shower heads poking out of the walls. He got the water going and quickly peeled away the sticky garments and slipping under the inviting stream of water. 

He let his muscles relax as he knew that the next day would be filled with rehab and painful massages. Shutting off the taps and blindly reaching for the towel he had hung over the door, when his hand only hit the wood of the door he began a feeling of uneasiness. He wiped the water from his eyes and brushed the now damp curls out of his face. When he saw the plain door with no clothes or towel in sight he instantly knew he was utterly screwed.  
He let out a groan as he realised the pickle he was in, you would think that being captain of the England test team would entitle a certain amount of respect, but when it came to stealing each others clothes it went straight out the window. 

He heard a bunch of giggles coming from the lockers, the whole team was there laughing at his predicament. “Alex if this was you I swear to god…” he left the threat hanging and went through his possibilities, stay in the stall till someone took mercy and got him a towel, streak through the lockers to his spare clothes or just hope for something else to come and help. 

“If you want your towel back Rooty you’ll need to come get it from your locker.” He thought for a moment then realised something, “Jonny? Oh come on I trusted you, I thought we had something you know fellow Yorkies and all.” He hollered. Again a round of laughter echoed through the door to the adjacenct room. Well what other choice did he have.

He slowly unlocked the door and let his still wet feet step out onto the cold tiles, you could here a pin drop as everyone held their breath waiting to see the outcome. Some waited nervously not particularly wanting to be involved while others were almost on the ground in tears.

Joe braced himself for the idiotic thing he was about to do, he placed his hands in front of him to cover majority of his manhood, not thinking of his soulmark at the moment as he had bigger problems and he couldn’t bring himself to care really. 

He began his quick dash and used sheer muscle memory to make his way around the kits laid on the ground and teammates laughing at his expense. Once he reached his locker he saw the empty overhead compartment where his towel and clothes should of appeared, he heard even louder laughter from the opposite side of the room. He swivelled quickly giving everyone a lovely view of his whole body, there stood Jonny holding his fluffy white towel in his grasps.

He stormed over there snatched the towel from his clutches and covered himself as quickly as possible, he turned around the room to see the team in various states of laughter except for one.

Jos sat there pale faced even though he could of sworn he was blushing like crazy just 30 second ago, he put down his beer down almost spilling the contents on his bag but he didn’t seem to care, he rushed out of the room avoiding the others and trying his best to remain undetected. 

As Joe scoped our the room he realised he had been the only one to notice the abrupt. No one seemed to care though as they kept on grinning as Joe grabbed his clothes this time careful to leave them inside the door.

When he finally re-emerged, this time fully clothed. He felt all eyes on him and they could tell he was a bit out of it, sure he laughed along with them and called them ‘Dickheads’ somewhat affectionately, but he still had a few moments were his eyes glazed over and he stared into space thinking hard.

Thank god Mo, the most sensible one grew tired of waiting for Joe to explain himself and on behalf of everyone finally asked. “Lad, what’s going on with ya?” Joe jerked his head up and saw pretty much all the room giving him the same curious look, “Nothing.” again they all stared familiar with his antics, “It’s just… Did any of you even notice Jos leaving?” He sounded slightly disappointed in them and it showed, they looked around the room with guilt. They hadn’t even see the shy and loyal teammate they had all grown to love slip out of the room, by the way Joe put it it sounded bad.

“He looked terrified, like something had spooked him then he just ran off.” He was silently asking for answers but he knew they wouldn’t come, “When did this happen?” Adil broke the silence. “Right after my little streaking episode. Why?” Adil thought for a moment when he said “He probably just got uncomfortable seeing you naked mate, nothing to be fretting over.” 

He nodded along but couldn’t get his face out of his mind, it didn’t look like someone uncomfortable. “Heavens forbid he see his boyfriend naked!” Their was a murmur from the other side of the room and he caught Curran red handed whispering to Hales, Joe sent a glare his way, “What do you mean ‘boyfriend’?”

Honestly never had he seen so many deadpan faces looking in his direction, this time Eoin took charge sick of dealing with his moody and oblivious friend.

“You and Jos act like an old married couple all the time, hell even Sam hasn’t been in the team long and he knows!”

“What. No me and Jos are totally platonic we do friend things not,” he gestured vaguely with his hand “coupley things!” 

“First of all great English Joe and secondly your wrong, do I need to give examples?” By the look Joe gave Eoin he really did.

“Ok well you’re the only one he let’s call him Jossy, he literally didn’t talk to me for three days cause I called him it but whenever you do he gets heart eyes.”

Joe shook his head in disbelief “So that’s just a nickname.” He looked around the room hoping for some sort of agreement on his behalf but found none.

“And how Joe NEVER gives anyone bum pats, however when Jos is even remotely in his vicinity or after a good catch he gets one every single goddamn time.” Jason spoke up (almost sounding jealous…) and soon everyone was nodding in agreement.

“Jos always takes the locker next to you.” Came from Mo, now they all started piping up adding their opinions.

“You made him test vice-captain before his first game back.”

“I’ve never seen you two not together on the bus.”

“You’re in half of each others instagram photos.”

“You borrow each others shirts all the time.”

“You guys always have movie nights when we’re on tour and no one else is invited.”

“And when were not on tour you two practically live together anyway.”

The thoughts made Joe dizzy, he didn’t do all these things did he? I mean sure the movie nights were just friends watching a film and they sat next to each other because they could always talk about stuff. 

By now everyone noticed the paled face Joe was wearing, A gentle had was placed on his shoulder and the familiar sight of short red hair made him relax just a tiny bit, “Mate, just go talk to him.”

He stood up and walked slowly out of the room, as he walked down the familiar halls he rubbed his head at the oncoming headache. Thinking about your possible love life and potential boyfriend will do that to you.

He opened the doors to the many rooms in the vast hallway, eventually he came across the only room he hadn’t checked. The physio room was a well known place among staff and players alike, he often found himself in these walls by the familiar blue massage tables covered in sports tape hiding the tears. Countless ankles strapped and Panadol on those hot summer days, it brought back memories. Good and bad, sure being in the environment with the kind physios and best medical care was great. But it also held the bad new, series missed out on, weeks of rehab even career ending injuries. 

But as he surveyed the room he noticed no sign of Jos even remotely there, sighing he shut the door and couldn’t think of any other place he may have gone. Then as he turned to survey the hallway again he could see the shadows cast by the stairs a few rooms down, of course he could of literally just gone upstairs to the balcony. So he quickly ran up the steps careful to stop before the door. 

He glance down at the stairs once more, at his chance for escape but before he lost courage he pushed open the door with surprising ease and caught sight of a figure hunched over in the front row of seats.

Broad shoulders and a clean haircut easily distinguished that it was Jos sitting just away from him. It seemed that in his thoughts and muttering he didnt notice his appearance, as to not startle him, he slowly walked to the row and took a seat with one space between them. Finally as if jolted from his thoughts Jos spoke up, “Its beautiful out here isn't it?” The question did not require an answer only a nod of the head. 

After a few minutes of silence simply staring at the pristine grounds now devoid of any groundsmen or cricketers, Joe breached the topic that had brought him out here in the first place. 

“Why did you run out of the room looking so… terrified?” He added the last part like a question, then waited to see what Jos would say. “Three lions, three fucking lions.” Jos still hadn’t looked at Joe yet but if he had he wouldnt of seen the confusion then realisation and finally shock. But none the less a smile broke out on his face.

“You mean you have?” Joe’s brain couldn’t comprehend the information “So we’re…” he left the word unsaid, he was so overjoyed but he still waited for the confirmation in Jos’ answer. 

“No.”

And with that Joe’s world shattered around him, his throat closed up and his breathing became laboured. This couldn’t be right, no he was meant to find his soulmate, the three lions would of made perfect sense would have given him everything he needed but instead decided to screw him over.

“What?” Finally he could form words because surely he must have heard wrong, “No, your wrong. We’re supposed to be soulmates. Arent we?” His voice quietned to a whisper at the end in doubt

“Obviously fucking not Joe, but thanks for rubbing salt in the wound!” The bitterness in Jos’ voice took him by surprise, the usual calm demeanour gone replaced by a bitter mood that wasnt going anytime soon.

“Are you sure?” He asked quietly trying hard not to invoke the rage that had made itself present. Without a moments notice Jos pulled up the familiar navy ODI shirt to expose the smooth tan skin on his hip without a blemish insight, unbelievably plain skin, without a mark or familiar blue ink. Skin he had wanted to touch and kiss and mark all fucking year now was suddenly out of reach.

“Sorr-“ before he could even begin to apologise he was cut off. “You know I fucking told myself not to get caught up on some guy, my captain none the less, that I stood no fucking chance with. I was stupid enough to think we would match, now I realise I was a goddamn idiot pining over some unavailable man that would never be right!” Each word put another crack in his heart, slowly tearing down the walls he built up after the disappointment of Ben. 

Jos was breathing a bit harder by the end of his outburst. He looked to Joe and saw the broken expression and a face that couldn’t even begin to fathom what was happening. Slowly guilt began creeping into the corners of his mind, but right now he was angry and without much thought he pushed those feeling out. 

“We can still…” Joe stopped mid sentence unsure of how to describe this predicament, “Be something.” He decided on. Jos grimaced “No we can’t Joe.” He said this time softer and more caring. “Why not?” Joe began to argue “Its happened before, my Aunty married someone she didnt match with and they’re happy with three kids, why can’t that be us? Why cant we at least try?” He still had hope for them, even after the rant Jos went on. 

“Because I dont want to just be some quick shag,” “You wouldnt-“ Joe tried to assure him, Jos let out a sad sigh anyone right minded person would having to explain to the person they loved why inevitably they would be left behind, forgotten and alone.

“Yes I would, we would date for a while, fuck around and whatever. Then you will find your soulmate and run off to be happy with the person made just for you not some second class crush. And I’ll be left in the dust watching you go on happy without me, I’d rather go through the pain now thanks.”

Joe was silent as he couldn’t think of a proper response, in all honesty he saw Jos’ point, he would hate for Jos to find his perfect match while he had to be broken up with and been simply a passing time.

While deep in his thoughts he didnt notice Jos standing and leaving, by now it was well past 10 and soon they boys would pack up and get on the bus back to the hotel to sleep off the alcohol and take advantage of a morning without a six o’clock wake up.

Slowly he crept downstairs and into the almost empty room to crab his kit, careful to. Avoid any teammates and questioning gazes,

He was sure everyone noticed but he didnt think anyone actually knew, Jos was a private person in general, but if they did know about the incident then they made sure not to mention it to his relief.

It took him by shock how quickly Jos terminated their once unbreakable friendship, soon it was a passing nod and only being addressed by last names. The only times they were alone was for leadership meetings, they were short and just about bowling rosters and batting lineup, the second Joe tried to start a normal conversation after all the business had been dealt with Jos made some excuse and hightailed outer there not to Joe’s surprise.

A few tests here, a couple T20’s there, a few weeks in Asia in humid hotels. Then suddenly it was winter and they had a few months off to recuperate and get ready for the upcoming battles, but of course Big Bash was only a few weeks away. Weeks of training together, a shared apartment they had booked previously, hotel rooms for the two England buddies and hours of flights with no personal space.

Australia was gonna be hell.


End file.
